Dear John Letter to Your Crush

Dear Crush,

I know you'll not be able to read this but I'm writing this anyway. I'd like to thank you so much for existing. I was getting pretty jaded there for a second and then you came along to cast a huge shining light on my life. I like the idea of how awesome I feel whenever you're there literally or figuratively. I don’t even care if we actually hook up (well, sort of). I’m just happy that you’re there.

I don’t know you that well, which is kind of great because it allows me to run wild with my imagination. Maybe you’re the kind of person who actually get along with your friends more often than not, or maybe you're the kind of person who loves music and can deal with different musical instruments. I really have no idea. I like not knowing. It lets me create a pretty picture of you and I having picnics, getting "kilig" under streetlights with HHWW, singing the same song in bed on a lazy Sunday afternoon, cuddling and listening to music when it’s raining, and going to cinema watching your choice movie with your arms wrapped around me. All of these things are possible in my head. You could be this person.

Crushes are a wonderful thing. It gives you butterflies in your stomach and a slowly fading smile on your lips. Everyone responds to them in the same way with this childlike sense of excitement and wonder. You can be 50 and still feel a smile develop when you’re listening to “I Wanna Hold Your Hand” because you get it and it gets you.

You represent possibility, a possibility of change and romance, of giving me something I’ve been craving for so long. And you don’t even know it! You’re just sitting there being cute and crushworthy, not even aware of the joy you’ve been giving me. If you knew, maybe you would be really creeped out or maybe you’d realize you felt the same way about me. I won’t know until I actually do something about it.

Therein lies the dilemma of having a crush. Do you actually want to act on it? Do you want to give them your phone number and resign yourself to feeling miserable until they finally text you? Sometimes it’s fun to just have the crush. The PG fantasy. Sometimes I just need to see you. I just need you to be there and be whoever I want you to be in my mind. It’s not always about actually seeing if you can get into a relationship with your crush. Sometimes they’re just there to make everything easier for you and become the highlight of your day. They’re there to make you feel younger and happier and silly. They add brighter colors to an otherwise drab period of your life.

So I don’t think I’m going to do anything about it. I think I’m just going to let it be. I’m going to keep you as my dream person and not have reality ruin anything. Don’t think of this as a sad thing. You’ll be the crush who will never be able to crush me.

Yours Truly,
Charles *wink*